- This topic has 2 replies, 2 voices, and was last updated 4 years, 9 months ago by Susan.
- September 15, 2015 at 2:45 pm #221Laura
How does your dislike of sounds make you feel as a person? Do you feel it’s a mark against your character? How have you been perceived by others as a result?
I often feel ridiculous, out of control, embarrassed, enraged…I feel upset that it makes me an unreasonable person, an irrational person.September 18, 2015 at 3:39 pm #244Allergic to SoundKeymaster
All those things. It also makes me feel really really guilty that I have these thoughts.December 6, 2015 at 12:03 pm #503Susan
I self diagnosed a year ago and was relieved there was a name for it. Previously I thought I was being overly sensitive; quick tempered and generally being a bitch. I have typically used humour to deal with it. I never tell the person at the time it is happening but afterwards i will let them know it bothered me. Saying that I never admit to them how extreme my reaction is when has caused my to rage internally. Sometimes I want to punch the person making the sound; knock their sandwich out of their hand. Most of the time I remove myself from the sound. At work I will go get a coffee or go talk to someone for 10 minutes. Give the person time to finish whatever they are eating. However I can’t always walk away .., not when I am in a meeting. It’s worse when the person chairing the meeting and doing most of the talking is the one making the sound. I can’t get up and leave, and I don’t feel I can tell them to stop eating. So internally I go into a rage. I stop listening to what is being said. All I can think about is wanting them to stop. I want to shove the sandwich down their thought or grab it from their hand and throw it across the room. I didn’t think anyone noticed but they have. I had feedback in my year end appraisal around not listening. I’m not saying that every time I may not be listening is because of misophonia, but I know in those meetings where there is a trigger then that’s why I stopped listening. Knowing doesn’t make me feel better about it. I don’t know if I should explain it to my boss. Those at work I have told have been supportive. They make an effort not to eat around me if there isn’t much background noise (for me if there is sufficient background noise then my trigger isn’t set off) or they acknowledge their eating may be annoying me, which sometimes is enough to reduce the impact. Telling my boss is different. I don’t want him to see me as less abled or to be dismissive. So I guess I am happy to know it’s not just me but uneasy as I don’t want it to negatively impact my life. Previously I didn’t think it did impact my life but in past 9 months it definitely is having a negative impact in some areas. I’m worried I’ve screwed things up
At work and in personal relationships because of it and Zi won’t be able to ‘fix’ them.